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mindfulness
Monday Mindset: Positive Quotes to Help Us Smile
May 11, 2020
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| Photo by Ellieelien |
I don't know about you, but this weekend was a roller coaster for me. I allowed myself to just wallow yesterday, and I think my body needed it. This morning, I woke up feeling upset, but then I looked at my phone and remembered that the Tone It Up Summer Challenge started today. As soon as I saw the reminder, I was instantly filled with hope because my week already had a pre-planned goal to look forward to. I had something to look forward to and a new community to share it with (that's my favorite thing about TIU - there are so many people to connect with while we focus on our health). Today's workout was only 15 minutes, so it was super attainable instead of feeling overwhelming.
Getting out of bed to do this short session completely reset my outlook. I still struggle with beating myself up (because I don't have the results I desire out of life yet ... I know, I'm learning to become more patient), but this morning, I committed to focusing on consistency/showing up for myself instead of focusing on the results. I know I'll have to work hard to maintain this healthy mindset, but my soul is experiencing a moment of blissful peace... and that is something I'm willing to work hard for. I know that the state of mental health is sporadic. I accept that. But as each week passes, I am discovering more and more ways to keep my small promises to myself, even when I am struggling or in a very dark place.
Yesterday was a low day, but today is already sooooooo much better. And that's what we HAVE to keep reminding ourselves of. The grief, the depression, the anxiety, the guilt, the shame, the loneliness... those are all extremely powerful emotions, but they are temporary. Although they do not always go away on their own, we are fortunate enough to have the resources/technology to seek help and do small things to help us get on the other side of them. I hope these quotes put a smile on your face like they did for me. And if today is one of your low days, that's ok. Feeling better is a process where instant gratification just slaps a band-aid on the wound instead of actually helping it heal. Slowly but surely, we are all healing, and that's something to smile about for sure.
Little Luxuries: Making the Most out of Boring Routines
January 25, 2020
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| Photo by Mgg Vitchakorn |
At first glance, this summary sounds boring as fuck. I totally admit that, but when you add little luxuries into your routine, the mundane can quickly transform into pure joy. Here are a few things I did to make the past 48 hours more luxurious.
1. Ordered my favorite meal: On Fridays, I usually head to a dance class after work, but I was feeling particularly run down this week after battling a cold. I knew I needed to spend the night in bed if I wanted to recover faster. So I ordered my favorite meal from my go-to bbq place (Hamilton Pork) and picked it up on my way home from work (I felt less guilty spending money since I avoided delivery fees). Then I started Money Heist on Netflix. Kendra recommended it to me because she knew how much I loved Elite (pretty sure it's the same writers and most of the cast is the same). It was honestly really fun to spend the night relaxing, alone and getting sucked into a new show.
2. Listened to a great podcast: I wanted to tidy up the kitchen and my bedroom a little bit before heading into the city... but chores are boring af. Thank the lord for podcasts! I love consuming knowledge while also being productive. Very few things make me feel as accomplished and put together. I listened to The Skinny Confidential this morning because it's a pretty balanced podcast and does a great job of providing comical, inspirational, informational and aspirational value. I highly recommend!!
3. Treated myself to a nice face masque: My skin if freaking the fuck out and I'm thinking it's because of my crappy diet. So I slathered my Jet Lag Summer Fridays Masque on after my dance class. I know it's probably in my head, but I swear that I instantly felt like I could conquer the world.
4. Took myself out to a healthy lunch: Dig In isn't my favorite, but it did leave me feeling pretty great. I love all of their sides, but my salmon was a tad bit too salty. Regardless, I've missed eating cleaner. Sometimes I forget how incredible healthy food is. I've missed having the energy that comes with clean(ish) eating.
5. Invested in myself (aka bought a Wing membership): This blogging platform is just one of the many things I have going on outside of my fashion PR job. I have big dreams and feel sooo freaking inspired working in this safe, beautiful and perfectly curated space. Whether I'm planning my next vacation, writing a blog post or mapping out my financial goals, I know I will be 100000% more productive here than in my apartment or at a coffee shop. I'm so excited to start attending the incredible events this company offers as well. I know I probably sound like a broken record by now, but if you have a specific vision for your life, it won't just magically happen on its own. We have to work to create it (while also remembering to rest when we need it). And I know working in an inspiring environment like The Wing will help me do so.
I hope you find a few small ways to make your next low-key weekend special. Whether you treat yourself to a new outfit or just make tea and light a candle while you drink it, luxury is in the eye of the beholder. Wishing you lots of love and happiness today and every day. And thanks again for reading this post. Your support means so much to me. Until next time friend.
September Mood Board: Accepting the Process
September 4, 2019
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| Photos by: Photo by Alessio Lin, will-myers.com, , , , |
September is such a lovely month. And with the start of a new month comes new goals to pursue. I think this month, I'm going to focus on accepting things as they are and as they appear. I'm going to approach situations with a wide-eyed sense of curiosity and wonder. And I'm going to focus on appreciating the beauty and simple magic that exists all around us in everyday life. There's just no point in making myself miserable over things I can't control or getting upset when things don't go my way. Yes, I like to be in control over the things I can actually control, but most things in life are out of my control. I've been trying to force so many specific things to happen in my career and dating life and trying to fix my relationship with myself overnight. And surprise, it's not working for me. I have been making myself miserable expecting instant gratification.
But I don't want you to misunderstand. I am in no shape or form giving up on any of my goals. In fact, I'm going to work harder than ever to become the person whom I wish to be. But I'm adjusting my strategy and just going to focus on being the best version of myself, for myself. Not for my boss, not for a romantic interest, and certainly not for social media/societal acceptance. I'm going to show up for life every single day (even on the really shitty, painful and dark days) to the best of my ability, literally just for me. And I know that some days I'll be able to show up for myself better than others, and I'm ok with that. Because creating the life I want is going to take a lot of dedication and a lot of time. And that process will have lots of highs and lots of lows, which I accept.
I know that the only way to actually live a fulfilled life where you feel confident and are proud of the person you see in the mirror is to push through the shitty days and remember that the rough times are just temporary. And when the time comes, I'll make the salary I deserve to make, find the person who wants to build an incredible life by my side and continue to build my sense of self-worth. And honestly, I can't think of a better feeling.
I wanted to thank you for spending time today to read this post. I hope you make your own monthly mood board and share it with me or one of your trusted friends. We all owe it to ourselves to seek out inspiration, and this is one of my favorite ways to start each month, with a little bit of inspo. Sending you all the love in the world.
How to Cope with the Negative & Overwhelming News Cycle
August 22, 2019
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| Photo by Branden Harvey |
*Disclaimer: I'm about to have a "she doesn't even go here" mean girls moment and get real sappy. You've been warned.
Sometimes, when I close my eyes, I like to pretend that I live in a faraway land where everyone is nice to each other. In this mythical place, people approach the differences in others with love, respect and intrigue, and violence is not a constant reality nor is it normalized. Yeah, that's a nice little daydream, but I know that it is far from how our world operates today.
Sometimes, when I close my eyes, I like to pretend that I live in a faraway land where everyone is nice to each other. In this mythical place, people approach the differences in others with love, respect and intrigue, and violence is not a constant reality nor is it normalized. Yeah, that's a nice little daydream, but I know that it is far from how our world operates today.
I've had quite a few discussions with friends recently about how we are experiencing extreme levels of anxiety. Between the mass shootings, a surplus of hate crimes, families that have been torn apart by the current administration, global warming and police misconduct, it's no surprise that most of my friends and I have trouble sleeping at night or have become way too familiar with panic attacks. But just because there is a ton of chaos in the world, that doesn't mean there also isn't a ton of good!
I am constantly researching ways to cheer myself up after reading the news. It's a tricky spot to be in because I want to stay aware of everything that is happening around the globe, but I also have had quite an amount of breakdowns after reading the news. I'm constantly on edge while doing the most mundane activities because I'm afraid that if I go to the movies, there could be a mass shooting or if I go to the grocery store at the wrong time, there could be a mass shooting or if I go to the wrong workout class, there could be a mass shooting. Or if I walk by the wrong police officer, I could get murdered.. you guys get the point. Most of us are on edge all the fucking time! And this is such an unhealthy way to live. So I've started seeking out a few different resources to help me calm the f down and learn to cope with the current state of the world. I wanted to share what I do to take care of my sanity because I know this is not a problem that is unique to me. I hope this list helps you find a little more peace in your day. And if you have any coping mechanisms, please share them below. I want us to support each other in every way possible.
What I do to cheer myself up after reading the news.
- Mobile Journaling - Although I love the ritual of writing in a physical journal with a beautiful pen, it's not always the easiest thing to carry around or whip out when you are on the go. One of my favorite new habits has been using my phone as a journal. I started a folder in my inotes app that is dedicated solely to journaling. This way, when I'm feeling super anxious, I can express myself, collect my thoughts and reassure myself that everything will be ok.
- I look at a lot of memes. This is the fastest way to cheer myself up. Laughter truly is the best medicine. Here is one of my favorite meme accounts on Instagram.
- I seek out positive news sources. Although I love my daily newsletters from Katie Couric and other sources, I NEED to read about a lot more positive things that are happening around the world. The Good News Newsletter by The Week is an amazing resource for happier news. I like that they actually share heartfelt, impactful stories instead of just fluff news. I signed up for their newsletter via my work email so I actually see it every week and am more likely to read it.
- I watch Queer Eye. It's one of the best reminders of humanity in the world. Wine and Queer Eye are an excellent combination... just saying.
- I chat with my friends about the current news. I have pretty amazing friends who are all very compassionate people. The news typically emotionally impacts them just as much as it impacts me. So discussing our thoughts usually makes me feel 10000 times better. It always helps me feel less alone and like our world has a fighting chance.
- I step away from technology and treat myself to a nice, warm cup of tea. We all know about the soothing health benefits tea, but have you ever thought about grabbing tea instead of coffee when you are stressed or feeling really down. The warm cup feels like a mini little hug. I believe there are a few studies that discuss the psychological benefits of holding a warm beverage.
- My last tip is to research ways to get involved. One time, I heard this great quote, "If an injustice makes you angry, that’s a sign that you should do something about it." So if reading an article makes you want to scream into a pillow, brings you to tears or want to punch something, hop on Google and find a reputable place to donate money to that cause or volunteer your time. The best way to feel better about the state of the world is to actively contribute to making it better.
Now it's your turn homie. Let me know in the comments what you do to get over the emotional hangover that usually lingers after reading the news? I'm so happy that we have each other to lean on when times get tough. That's one thing I love about the internet; it allows us to expand our support system in ways that were never possible before. Thank you so much for spending time reading this! I love and appreciate you soooooo much more than you could ever know. Until next time my friend.
Shop the Look: This section includes affiliate links.
I randomly found all of these items while thrift shopping or during sales, so I encourage you to go scavenger hunting this weekend. But if you don't have time to shop IRL, here are some similar pieces you can buy on the world wide web.
I wanted to share another more personal post today, but I also wanted to share a cute look. So I’m doing both in this post, frankly because I feel like it. So whether you relate to this post, find inspiration in the outfit, or get a laugh because you think I’m a sad little peasant, I hope you walk away feeling a little bit better today. :)
*Oh, and there is some cursing in this post, so if you're offended by foul language, this isn't the post for you.
I’m proud to admit that I’ve always been pretty ambitious, and I’ve been blessed enough to be surrounded by hard-working, ambitious, talented people who inspired me and cheered for my success. Now that I’m 1.5 years out of college, my ambition is still there, but my strong sense of confidence and self esteem is not. What can I say? I’m not strong 100% of the time like most of my friends think.
I went from having a large community of cheerleaders physically around me 24/7 to just having myself as a cheerleader. Anyone who moves to a new city alone after college goes through the same thing. It’s a brave and exciting adventure, but it’s also terrifying to no longer be in your tight-knit community. In the real world, you’re thoughts of self-doubt are louder than ever before.
And let me tell you, I can say some pretty nasty things to myself. If anything, my inner voice is like a cheerleader from hell straight out of a 90's movie who’s sole purpose is to try to destroy my self worth and convince me that I’ll never have what I want, so...why bother.
But then I have to take a step back and remind myself that:
A) Telling myself these negative, false beliefs in a FUCKING WASTE OF TIME! I’m literally wasting precious energy on thoughts that don’t serve me or move me towards my goals. That’s not ok because (here comes the cliche but damn true saying) where intention goes, energy flows! Asnd here’s the real key. Are you ready? That nasty voice will always be there in the back of our heads telling us to give up. Telling us to play it safe. Telling us we can’t accomplish this goal. We have to accept that the voice will never go away, but we don’t have to listen to it. I named my mean girl voice Regina, and I tell her to shut up when she starts trying to break me down.
B) Instead of shutting down and cocooning myself in bed (which I admit I’ve been doing a lot lately) I should grab a pen and paper and figure out why I feel so overwhelmed. Even if you’re not a writer, I seriously advise doing this. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. Purging the stress out is the best way to work through it. Want to avoid a hand cramp? Record yourself talking through it. I know there’s a lot of controversy around Joel olsteen, but homeboy gives some great advice. He once said that the same problems will keep showing up in your life until you confront and overcome them. Once those problems are literally staring you in the face, written in your journal, you’re more inclined to make those problems your little bitch.
C.) If I want to cultivate confidence and self-esteem, I have to take action! I’m not just going to wake up one day and feel like I’m killing the game if I don’t take small actions that will get me closer to the life I want to live. And please notice that I said SMALL. Sometimes I get a little bit list-happy and write down every single thing I need to do to accomplish a goal. I did that for my blogging/digital content creator career and you know what happened/still happens from time to time? I looked at that multiple-page list, and I shut the fuck down because it’s so overwhelming. Isn’t that ironic that how making lists in one aspect can free me and in another aspect, it makes me feel hopeless? After learning this lesson time and time again (aka me curled up in bed, ugly crying and too overwhelmed to get out of bed to even eat, let alone leave the house that day) I realized that I need to limit myself to setting small goals each day, regardless of how much I want to create an elaborate action plan.
D) And finally, I remind myself to ask for help! I reach out to my best friends who remind me that, number one, I can have everything I want if I get out of my own damn way. And number two, no matter what I accomplish, they will still love and cherish me. I have nothing to prove. And neither do you. I went to the amazing Girl Boss Rally this weekend, and one of my favorite speakers pointed out that we are already enough. We don’t have to prove anything to the world, and we have a purpose just by existing. What a lovely reminder that you’re already a rockstar and should chill when it comes to beating yourself up, right?
Confidence isn’t built in a day; it’s an ongoing project. I hope that this post encourages you to love yourself a little bit more and forgive yourself for not being perfect. Coming from a recovering perfectionist, it’s a good thing that we aren’t perfect. Perfect is fucking boring! I still struggle with trying to be perfect, but I’m getting better at letting go of the “perfect me, perfect life” mentality that I've held on to since elementary school. You will too if you take the time out each week to remind yourself that you’re a badass for going after what you want, no matter what it is. The struggles are just part of the process, honey.
Need more words of encouragement? I’ve linked some of my favorite self-esteem boosters below.
- Affirmations - This might feel weird but affirmations are a great way to feel confident if you embrace them.
- Impact Theory episode
- The Oprah Magazine Instagram account - it's full of so many amazing quotes
September Mood Board
September 9, 2017
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| Photo Credits: Brigitte Tohm, Alexandra Gorn, Jorge Oliveira, Jenny Rollo |
I have mixed feelings about summer coming to such an abrupt end. Technically, fall doesn't start until September 22nd, but it feels like full on fall here in NYC. On one hand, I do love wearing sweaters and not feeling like I'm about to die from a heat stroke on the subway, but on the other hand, there's something so freeing about the warm summer months. Regardless, this transitional period is one I'm excited about.
I've been channeling this romantic, dreamy and glamorous vibe for the month of September. I spent almost all of August beating myself up for mistakes I made or for not having all of my shit 100% together 100% of the time. This REALLY impacted my mood, confidence and energy. I've always pushed myself, but I've also always put too freaking much pressure on myself, which is not healthy. I am so ready to rejuvenate by practicing self-care and radiating love all around me. I'm making a conscious effort to enjoy the smallest things this month and pamper myself (on a budget of course). So cheers to an amazing month full of whimsy, adventures and gratitude. Leave a comment below letting me know what's inspiring you this month! Let's make the most out of this September!
P.S. This post contains affiliate links. That means if you make a purchase through one of these links, I receive a small commission. Thank you for supporting my blog!
A Quick Note on Gratitude
August 22, 2017
Outfit: Dress (old) Forever 21; Shoes Sigerson Morrison
I don't know if its just me, but the past few days, I've felt very...off. I've been blowing off my responsibilities and a lot of things have just NOT been going as planned at all, and that's an understatement. But today, I go so sick of being in my funk that I knew I had to do something to put my butt back on track. The first thing I did was write 3 things I'm feeling grateful for, and I have to say, after looking at my current situation from a new perspective, I instantly felt better! Plus, this little trick took less than 2 minutes to complete but changed my entire day! So here are three things that I'm grateful for today!
1. Having the wifi restored in my apartment! It's been out for the past three days, so I'm beyond happy to have access to the internet from the comfort of my own bed again.
2. Loving and supportive friends. Like I said, the past few days have been really tough for me. A LOT happened all in the course of 24 hours, but so many of my friends in different parts of the country were there to support me and helped me turn my tears into laughs.
3. Audible! I downloaded Mel Robbin's The 5 Second Rule today. It's been on my reading list for months. I am so thankful that she was courageous enough to share such a raw and kick-ass book. If you need someone to give you a little tough love and encouragement to go after what you've been afraid to pursue, this book is 1000% for you! And if you're new to audible, your first 30 days are free, so you really don't have an excuse not to listen to this book on your way to work or class tomorrow.
P.S. I get commission for purchases or clicks made through the above link in this post. Thanks for supporting my blog!
The second thing I did was treat myself to an entire pint of Halo Top all natural ice cream... sometimes you just need a small pick-me-up. Plus the entire pint was only 360 calories and it was on sale... so it would have been irresponsible if I hadn't purchased it (or that's the story I'm telling myself). Now it's your turn! What 3 things are you currently grateful for, and what quick tricks do you use to pull yourself out of a funk?
Mindful Mornings: The Power of Podcasts
July 22, 2017
As I re-launch my site, the main direction that I plan to take involves a lot of venerability and transparency. As I mentioned in my about me section, I really want to share the highs and the lows with you guys. That being said, today I wanted to share part of my wellness daily routine with you guys.
This might come to a surprise to anyone who knew me in college, but I’ve had A LOT of dark times since moving to NYC a year ago. And I don’t mean just sad, I mean that I was struggling to get out of bed every morning and cried at least 4 times a week because I felt so defeated.
I still fight these feelings frequently, but I know my life and happiness are in my own hands, so I decided to do something about it. By adding this one simple step to my morning routine, I feel so much stronger and inspired. What’s the one step I took to change my life? Listening to informational podcasts.
Each day, I listen to a designated podcast based on the handy little podcast schedule I created ( I know, very nerdy and type A of me). These podcasts talk about everything from career and business advice; financial, physical and mental health; relationships and more. Basically they all serve the purpose of helping the listeners become better versions of themselves. But I’m not exaggerating when I say that listening to these inspiring messages every morning rekindled my fire to fight for a better life.
I hope these podcasts bring as much inspiration and clarity to your life as they have for me. What episode stood out the most to you? do you have a go-to podcast series that you listen to when you need some encouragement? Let me know in the comments below because I’d love to add some more to my list!
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